| Women Living With a Purpose |
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| Written by Andrea Pauquet |
| Thursday, 30 July 2009 14:29 |
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I wonder if it's a life-stage thing. Perhaps it's the final stage of burnout or the result of boredom. What I am noticing is that those around me are asking "Why?" more: "Why am I running around like a mad woman?" "Why does it have to be so hectic?" "Why is being at home with my kids just not enough? I climbed the ladder and at the top of the corporate empire", my voice continues to scream, "WHY, and for what, am I doing this?" Knowing Your Value
For many of us, the result of this type of spinning is despair, depression, anxiety, detachment and a feeling of meaninglessness and separation from life, from those we love, and in my case, from God. Hoarding and Having You may say that this is all a bit heavy. Hang in there. Heaviness and even despair has often been for me the greatest gift. I got to a point in my early twenties when I decided that having and power were not going to work for me. I had no idea what was going to work and had a real crisis about what I believed. In fact, I even rejected my faith and my culture, living in a foreign land where I could overthrow all my assumptions. I then slowly rebuilt my life around who I really was and what was really true for me (a never-ending process). What I write about now is as a result of many mini and major life crises and much prayer; about my own existence. There are days and months where the plot is lost and it's "back to basics". Let's talk about some of the basics of purpose. Let me start by saying that formulas for finding purpose don't work for me. What we can do, perhaps, is to chip away at the assumptions that hold us back from discovering our true, Divinely-orchestrated selves. We can ask questions and gather the answers from our hearts. We can then look for the new patterns that challenge the old, and make new choices. I borrow ideas and activities that I may have read or experienced along the way. Grab your journal so you can start to chip away! When we know our function, our "why", then our uniqueness plays itself out in the "how" with passion and balance. I believe that we grow up and form some of our strengths through our roles. Within our stories are secrets and clues to our personal jewels or strengths. How would you be different today if you knew that the hurt, loss and pain of your past were not for nothing? That those events have shaped and even given birth to the value you can add to the world today? We also have hard-wired talents that come from the way our brains and hearts were designed. In a great book called Authentic Happiness, Seligman speaks of the fact that happiness involves knowing what our "signature strengths" are and then making sure we share these strengths with others for an even deeper level of happiness. His research showed that the happiest souls are those that know and share their talents, but also believe in a greater master plan. They attributed meaning to something or someone greater than themselves. On a scale of 1 to 10, how at peace would you say you are? Do you know what makes you unique? Are you prepared to take a risk and ask "why"? First Steps To 'Why?' Once you know more about the truth of where you are at and where you would like to be, then the third key, according to Fritz, is to make new choices based on what you know. Let's build some creative tension. Choose an object or an animal that for some reason comes to mind. It can be anything: a heater, a tree, a cat, a teaspoon, a candle (these come to my mind, not yours). Now: very quickly describe that object in as much detail as you can. Start your sentences with "I am... I am old/young/big/small. I do... etc. Write about your function, your surroundings, what you like, dislike etc. Exhaust your ideas. Don't think too much, just observe what comes to mind and put it down. This little story may be the first step to giving you clues about where you are at. Now, without judging yourself, do you like what the descriptors or the story says? What does it say about where you are at that you may not have really recognised until now? What would you like to change? Are you satisfied with the object you chose but want to change what it does, how it looks or add more or less of some element? Now redraw the same symbols the way you would like them to be or draw a new object that says more about your future ideal. What function would you like to serve? What object would you like others to describe you as? How would you like them to describe you? Write down the new descriptors, functions and words for this object starting each sentence with "I am...". If you are able to go on, perhaps you could write down one thing you would like to change, even if you have no idea how to do so as yet. Intention is an amazing thing. It sets the course so that new opportunities for action become visible. A Word On Assumptions My Job is My Mission My Role is My Mission Mother, wife, caretaker, career-woman; as women, we tend to strongly attach our roles to our mission. Divorce, children leaving home or a parent dying throw us into a black abyss of meaninglessness. Our mission is far greater than our roles as women. If you realise your mission, your roles change and you can still add value. I Am Not Important Enough to have a Mission My Mission Needs to be a Huge One Where I Help Many Many humble mothers with nothing raised great leaders who changed the world. Teachers have impacted your life in ways that they may never know. If you are parenting or teaching, healing or caring for or praying for one another, you can consider your life a success. Your mission is under your nose! When you get that, you can stop diminishing the grand in your back garden. Do You Need to Scatter Some Purpose-squashing Assumptions? Back to Reality! Imagine believing that you are called to impact those around you with your own gifts and talents? How would you be living differently today? Spend the next month looking out for the ways you naturally influence our world. Gather courage and ask your friends and family how they see you impacting the universe. If you left the world, what would they miss? |






